Sin título

envyadams

today at work i let someone into a dressing room and they said “thanks” and half of me tried to say “you’re welcome” and the other half tried to say “no problem” and i ended up saying “your problem”

lilmotel

thejourneytonirvana

this post had me in tears

ghost-plot

I was hoping the notes would be full of similar stories, but they’re not, so I’ll add my story for anyone else looking for more laughs:

I had to go to a library to pay a fee and I was practicing in the car between “I have to pay a fine” and “I have to pay a fee” and I walked in and firmly stated “I have to pee” and slapped a five dollar bill on the counter (the fee was like ten cents), and walked out. This was like three years ago and I still haven’t been back,

greatestgoth

My friend was driving and we were almost past our turnoff so I tried to say “quick” and “fast” at the same time and I ended up screaming “QUACK” which ended up with him judging me very hard and missing the turn

soldieronbarnes

Recently someone in class asked me how I was doing and I started off saying I was good but switched to I’m okay in the middle and ended up saying “I’m gay.”

Which, while kind of accurate, was not what I meant to announce to my classmate.

spankyhole

This Halloween I was handing out candy and a child said “trick or treat” and I smiled gave them their candy and apparently my mouth betrayed me and I said “Merry Christmas” and proceeded to sit down and look up to the sky for answers while their mother laughed at me :)))))

grimbarkgrimdark

I was switching between “Bye Deanna” and “Goodbye” and I ended up saying “Go Die”

stellaathena

Sometimes I try to say “I fucking love you” but it comes out in the wrong order and then everyone’s uncomfortable.

magebirb

When I first started my coffee shop job, I was still getting used to greeting customers as they came in the door. A man walked in, and in the jumble of trying to say, “How are you doing?” and “What’s up?” I ended up demanding “What are you doing here?!”

ledamemangociana

something really cool happened once at the office and i started to say “i’m so amazed” but halfway through my mind changed to “that’s really amazing” and i just ended up saying “i’m really so amazing”

tinyhanded

one time i was out in the woods in the spring when the birds were just beginning to come out again and i went to say “i’m so pumped for the birds” and “i’m so hyped for the birds” and instead i said “i’m so humped for birds”

runningaftershadows

Once I was walking to school and there was a guy walking his dog and the dog came to me and started sniffing me and I was in such a good mood and when I passed by his owner I wanted to say like “hello” or “good morning” or “cute dog” or something like that and I ended up looking up at him, smiling real big, and saying “thank you”.

thegenderfluiddruid

I was at the convenience store and I was going to buy a drink, but i dropped my keys and the drink when I got to the register so I got caught between “my drink!” and “my keys” and ended up screaming “MY KINK.”

meme-of-lord

I walked up to this register,in a target. When the cashier finished checking me out she said have a good day, and i wanted to say “You have a good day” and “You too” so it came out “You have a good do do”

thatonevaleriegirl

I FUCKIN H HIT MY HEAD ON A CHAIR FROM LAUGHING TOO HARD AT THIS FUCKING POS T

andyouknowit

This post is too good. I once tried to say have a nice day or have a good day to a customer and said ‘Have a nude gay!’. Still haven’t recovered.

strawberryaj

OOC: i get really used to working nights or days at my work so i’m often jumbled between “have a nice night” and “have a good day” so often it comes out as “have a nice neigh” or “have a good date” or occasionally even “have a night die”

m4ge

in first grade someone apologized to me and i responded by saying “you’re welcome” and i still haven’t recovered

comicconverse

I was mad at my friend Gabe and tried to call him a bitch, ended up calling him “babe”. It’s been four years and he still hasn’t let it go

chronicimpulsivereader

My little sister tried to say “sneaky” and “secretive” at the same time and ended up saying “sneakrative”

ahyperactivehero

One time my friend’s mom was driving us home and she tried to yell “Opossum! ” because one ran out into the road, but it got mixed up with “My God!” And came out “MUFASA!” She laughed so hard she had to pull over and my friend almost had an asthma attack.

sweetdansvestite

Once I went to this restaurant my family and I had been going to since I was an infant,and I wanted to ask if my family had been going there since before I was born. Well,something got mixed up in my brain and I ended up turning to my mom and saying “Did you guys come here when I was still alive?” And my mom lost her damn mind.

lux-obscura:
“ lux-obscura:
“ breelandwalker:
“ deenadolly:
“ districtsugar:
“ doveclove:
“ niuniente:
“ muscovado-sugar:
“ xi-vi-xiv:
“ bme-and-wttc:
“ sherlysthougths:
“ justthefangirl:
“ timaeustestifieds:
“ nudiemuse:
“ recklesscloudz:
“ Reblog...

recklesscloudz

Reblog and you’ll find money soon!

nudiemuse

Yes.

Also weird I reblobbed the other money one last night and a freelance check I invoiced for a month ago came in.

timaeustestifieds

reblobbed

justthefangirl

seriously have nothing to lose

sherlysthougths

Did it once might as well let it stack. At least I’m not buying loto tickets

bme-and-wttc

You guys, I reblogged this 2 days ago out of desperation. Today I was looking through my old wallet for coins to go to the vending machine because that’s all I can fucking afford. I haven’t touched this thing since July/ August. When I found a disappointing 15 cents in the coin pocket I went to the billfold to see if any coins were in there. That’s when I saw them. 5 crisp bills amounting to $22. I literally screamed and danced around my room out of joy before remembering that I’d reblogged this post.

Tl;dr - This post is fucking magical and actually worked for me.

xi-vi-xiv

I’m broke as fuck. Money gods pls send me like 100k.

muscovado-sugar

I never reblog these, let’s give it a shot.
BIG MONEY, BIG MONEY

niuniente

I reblogged this last week and withing an hour I got a client after a month of silence! Literally gave me money to eat for the rest of the month.

doveclove

Crazy enough but my mom randomly gave me 200 dollars after I reblogged one of these the other day…

districtsugar

Amen

deenadolly

Reblobbed.

breelandwalker

I have a theory that these posts actually gather energy from the wishes of people who reblog them and that’s why they work. Plus, yanno, they get passed around by witches…a lot. :)

lux-obscura

Financials are getting a little rocky here (new job was a pay cut and was supposed to be an hours increase but ended up being more of a cut/lateral move) and I’m still trying to figure out how to downgrade my spending (seriously how can I cancel some of my cable services and end up paying MORE than before fucking packages fucking Verizon…) so in the meantime I could really go for a cash infusion until I get myself sorted.

lux-obscura

Ok this is such a ridiculous coincidence but I JUST reblogged this this morning and between then and now my tax refund hit my account 3 days early.

Draw your own conclusions.

See, that’s what the app is perfect for.